Shadows

I’m fascinated by shadows. Sometimes shadows are more interesting that the solid object that creates them. These shadows in an Italian church caught my eye, as shadows often do.

I live in a land of strong shadows in the Southwest, where the light is powerful and clear and the shadows are often strong and distinct. Today we are having a cloudy day and there are no shadows. A rare event here. I always thought I didn’t like cloudy days because I missed the light. But today, I’ve decided I miss the shadows. Shadows provide . . .

I never

“I never said that!” I said in shocked denial.

My four kids exchanged looks. The youngest, Sammy, always the spokesperson, answered, “Mom, we all heard you say it. You said it.”

“You guys are making this up. You’re just trying to pull a fast one on me.”

“Mom,” Sammy said, “you did say it. And you meant it.”

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It’s perfect

“It’s perfect,” he said, and made a ceremony of carrying it to the refrigerator to mount it in a place of honor.

He smiled at 4 year-old Ethan, who had followed him into the kitchen to watch the ceremony of putting the latest art work on the frig. It was solid black scribble Ethan declared “doggie.”

He took down the solid black scribble from yesterday, the one Ethan named “tree,” and carried it to the art box where he saved all of Ethan’s drawings. Ethan followed him to the box, crutches thumping gently on the hard wood floor.

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The last time

“I’m trying to think,” he said. He leaned back in the battered wooden rocking chair that occupied his front porch, settling in to tell me a story. “When was the last time I saw that noisy dad-gum cougar up in the hills?”

He fiddled with his pipe and struck a big kitchen match. “Must have been ’bout five years ago, at least. I was up on Old Baldy hunting deer and I heard him yowling and growling. Caught a glimpse of him up in those rocks where he had his den. Gray haired as I am, that old cat. Looked like my granddaddy.”

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Honey

Each spring brings a wave of honey consumption into my life. Local honey. Not because I love the sweet taste, although it is good. Not because I need to add calories to my diet; I clearly don’t. No, it’s about spring allergies. Local honey helps bring the sneezing, sniffling, itching throat and burning eyes under control. Another measure I’ve reluctantly learned to take in the battle against the runny nose is to wash out my sinuses with salt water. Ew. I like the non-drug, old timey remidies because . . .

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I love that

I love that she uses her GPS system to mark the location of wild flowers she wants to return to later to see if they’ve bloomed. I love that she actually stops the car and gets out and wanders off into the desert a bit when she sees spots of color that might be wildflowers. I love that she’s learning how to use photos in RAW format rather than as JPGs because she thinks she can do more with them if she learns about it. I love that we share the same first name and maybe someone will mistake me for her.

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Get up off of that thing

There were signs all along the elevated wooden walkway through the swamp: “Beware of alligators” in red letters every few yards. Yet I rounded a turn in the walkway and saw a mom posing her chlld for a photo on the back of an alligator below the walkway.

“Get up off of that thing,” I screamed. I ran to grab the child, bumping the mom out of my way as I ran. I got the kid, but she broke her arm when she fell. And that’s how I ended up in court defending myself against assault charges.

The judge. . .

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The wind

Who is the wind beneath your wings? A friend, spouse, parent, religion? Do you have someone supporting and encouraging you?

I’m not convinced that I do. I think I do much more holding than being held. This is not all bad, particularly if you’re the independent sort of introvert like I am. It helps if you aren’t prone to loneliness.

But there’s always an underlying foundation in every person. Probably put there by a combination of genetics and parenting. Or birth order. Or circumstance. What’s holding you aloft?

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Cookie Dough

Somehow cookie dough had become a test of her motherhood. She looked at the chocolate chip cookie dough, rife with uncooked eggs, and then at her 4 year old twins. Kelly, the bolder of the two, asked, “Can we have a bite?” and both sets of innocent brown eyes turned up to her, waiting.

She had to decide now, no deliberating. She hated decisions like that. Was she the kind of mom who let her kids eat raw eggs? Or was she the kind of mom who made them wait until the cookies came out of the oven, safely cooked to a germ-free perfection?

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Wolves

There will be wolves. Today as part of Earth Day, there will be wolves on display at Whole Foods. Wolves are huge, awesome and powerful. We could learn a lot from the wild predators. We are predators ourselves, a fact we manage to ignore very successfully most of the time. But when you look at the state of the predator in nature, you realize that the survival of the ecosystem depends on the health of the predator. Predators are big and easier to see and all the little growing and furry things that they depend on. . . .

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