So Much

There is so much blood.

No, that’s a cliche, write something different for this scene.

I love you so much, if you die on me I’ll kill you!

No, that joke has been used.

Sorry, but I’ve had so much coffee I need to be excused.

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Divided

“Oh, let’s watch that one!”

“Yuck. I hate romcoms. Chick flicks are a bore.”

“I love them. They always make me feel good and have a happy ending.”

“They’re so silly. Let’s watch something with some action. How about this one?”

“Nothing happens in that one except shooting people and then walking away as if nothing happened.”

“Yeah. That’s cool.”

“You can’t enjoy love and I can’t enjoy murder. Have I got that right?”

“Yep.”

“You can go home now.”

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Spiders

Banded garden spider

This big fellow was outside, so he survived. Lucky spider.

I have a strict rule about spiders who think they want to live in the house with me. The rule is – YOU’RE GETTING SMASHED! That rule doesn’t apply if my son is around, because he will carefully take you outside where you belong.

If you are a spider anywhere near my in my house, you’d better hope my son is visiting the day you appear. Otherwise, it’s sayonara, spider.

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Change Your Password

Time to change your password. That’s the most terrifying phrase of the modern age. So many passwords. You need a system, special software, just for all those passwords. If you’re really modern, you can use your thumbprint. Or your retina. Or your face. So every company in the world recognizes your face.

Oh, sorry, you are temporarily unable to do the next thing until you change your password.

Reset. Reset. Reset.

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Patriotic

my ukulele

I play the ukulele. This time of year the patriotic songs come out. Most of them are marches – It’s a Grand Old Flag, Yankee Doodle. The ukulele is not meant to play marches. Bring your trumpet and your drum if you want to march down the street with a flag because a uke won’t do the job.

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The Long Hot Summer

Remember when you were a kid – back in the days before kids spent their time looking at a screen? When summer lasted forever and getting outside in the heat was the best thing ever? Riding the bike, playing hide and go seek after sunset, skipping down the sidewalk, getting an ice cream cone at the drug store, watching ants and grasshoppers with fascination? Yeah. Me, too.

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Frogs

It was so wet, even the frogs had to look for higher ground. Right now they were clinging to the siding on the south wall outside my house. The ground was soaked and flooded, the rain was still coming, and the weather map showed a bright red extreme weather spot right over us. I might have to make like a frog soon, and climb up to the top of my house.

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Getaway

Lunch beachside at The Poseidon Restaurant in Del Mar

I put this question to the group of co-workers sharing lunch in the cafeteria.

Quick! Best getaway for someone who lives in the desert? It has to involve green plants in abundance and lots of water.

The coast of France came up, Florida was suggested, one person thought Oregon was a good idea. Nearby mountain lakes made the list. It all sounded wonderful. And expensive. So I spent my weekend in a lawn chair fishing under some cottonwoods near the river.

Great getaway!

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In 3D

Inside the aquarium at Meow Wolf
Inside the aquarium at Meow Wolf

Have you been to Santa Fe, NM, to visit Meow Wolf yet? If you go, be sure to get the 3D glasses. The displays and objects inside the exhibition are visually exciting anyway, but some of them are amazing in 3D. Eye popping is no exaggeration!

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The Cloud

The cloud passed over the mountain, creating a dark shadow among the trees below. It reformed itself constantly as it glided silently toward the foothills. I could see it dropping rain in the arroyos for several minutes. Finally it drifted off in my direction and faded to nothing. No rain for me.

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